Best divorce letter ever!

Love often comes with the expectation of permanence, but life doesn’t always unfold as we envision, leading to separations. In one instance, a husband believed that ending his marriage through a heartfelt letter would minimize the pain. Little did he know, his decision would trigger an unexpected and humorous response from his clever wife, imparting a valuable lesson. This exchange of letters showcases the unpredictability of relationships and how humor can arise even in challenging moments.

Dear Wife, I’m writing you this letter to tell you that I’m leaving you for good. I’ve been a good man to you in our 7 years of marriage & I have nothing to show for it. These last 2 weeks have been tough for me. Your boss notified me that you quit your job today & that was just too much to bear any longer. Last week, you came home & didn’t even notice I had a new haircut, had cooked your favorite meal & even wore a brand new pair of silk boxers. You ate in 2 minutes, & went straight to sleep after watching all of your soaps. You don’t tell me you love me anymore; you don’t want sex or anything that connects us as husband & wife. Either you’re cheating on me or you don’t love me anymore; whatever the case, It’s over and I am leaving. Your EX-Husband P.S. don’t try to find me. Your SISTER & I are moving away to West Virginia together! Have a great life!

Dear Ex-Husband, Believe me, nothing has made my day more than receiving your letter. It’s definitely true that you & I have been married for the past 7 years, although a good man is a far cry from what you’ve been. I watch my TV shows so much because they drown out your constant whining & griping, although that doesn’t seem to work. I definitely noticed your haircut last week, but the 1st thing that came to mind was ‘You look just like a girl!’ And since my mother raised me not to say anything if you can’t say something nice, I decided not to comment. And when you cooked my favorite meal, you must have gotten me confused with MY SISTER, because I stopped eating pork 7 long years ago. About those new silk boxers: I turned away from you because the $49.99 price tag was still on them, & I prayed it was a coincidence that my sister had just borrowed $50 from me that morning. After all of this, I still loved you & felt we could make this work. So when I hit the lotto for 10 million dollars, I quit my job & bought us 2 tickets to Jamaica. But when I got home you were gone. Everything happens for a reason, I guess. I hope you have the fulfilling life you always wanted. My lawyer said that the letter you wrote ensures you won’t get a dime from me. So take care. Signed, Your Ex-Wife, Rich As Hell & Free! P.S. I don’t know if I ever told you this, but my sister Carla was born Carl. I hope that’s not a problem!

Related Posts

The Brass Beauty: A Look Back at Vintage Veterinary Craftsmanship

The Mystery of the Brass Tool At first glance, this brass object with a leather strap might seem mysterious. In reality, it was once an essential veterinary…

The Quiet Lesson a Missing Wedding Ring Left Behind

Every long marriage collects a few gentle mysteries — routines that go unexplained and questions that soften with time. For Maria, that mystery was her husband’s bare…

Dolly Parton and Hulk Hogan joined in matrimony during a shocking in-ring event shown live

The Night Dolly “Married” Hulk Hogan — When Country Glitter Met Wrestling Madness Long before viral stunts dominated the internet and reality TV blurred the line between…

Young Actor Chooses to Step Back From Hollywood to Focus on Family Life

Young stars in Hollywood often appear to live ideal lives, surrounded by opportunity, attention, and constant excitement. From the outside, it all seems effortless. But growing up…

Sally Field, Now 76, Maintains a Natural Look Despite Ongoing Industry Pressure

In a world where red carpets and magazine covers often highlight youth, Sally Field stands out as someone who has built her career on talent, honesty, and…

For this reason, every pair of jeans has a little pocket within the front pocket

For this reason, every pair of jeans has a little pocket within the front pocket… We have, I assume, been speculating. And despite our best efforts, we…