Best divorce letter ever!

Love often comes with the expectation of permanence, but life doesn’t always unfold as we envision, leading to separations. In one instance, a husband believed that ending his marriage through a heartfelt letter would minimize the pain. Little did he know, his decision would trigger an unexpected and humorous response from his clever wife, imparting a valuable lesson. This exchange of letters showcases the unpredictability of relationships and how humor can arise even in challenging moments.

Dear Wife, I’m writing you this letter to tell you that I’m leaving you for good. I’ve been a good man to you in our 7 years of marriage & I have nothing to show for it. These last 2 weeks have been tough for me. Your boss notified me that you quit your job today & that was just too much to bear any longer. Last week, you came home & didn’t even notice I had a new haircut, had cooked your favorite meal & even wore a brand new pair of silk boxers. You ate in 2 minutes, & went straight to sleep after watching all of your soaps. You don’t tell me you love me anymore; you don’t want sex or anything that connects us as husband & wife. Either you’re cheating on me or you don’t love me anymore; whatever the case, It’s over and I am leaving. Your EX-Husband P.S. don’t try to find me. Your SISTER & I are moving away to West Virginia together! Have a great life!

Dear Ex-Husband, Believe me, nothing has made my day more than receiving your letter. It’s definitely true that you & I have been married for the past 7 years, although a good man is a far cry from what you’ve been. I watch my TV shows so much because they drown out your constant whining & griping, although that doesn’t seem to work. I definitely noticed your haircut last week, but the 1st thing that came to mind was ‘You look just like a girl!’ And since my mother raised me not to say anything if you can’t say something nice, I decided not to comment. And when you cooked my favorite meal, you must have gotten me confused with MY SISTER, because I stopped eating pork 7 long years ago. About those new silk boxers: I turned away from you because the $49.99 price tag was still on them, & I prayed it was a coincidence that my sister had just borrowed $50 from me that morning. After all of this, I still loved you & felt we could make this work. So when I hit the lotto for 10 million dollars, I quit my job & bought us 2 tickets to Jamaica. But when I got home you were gone. Everything happens for a reason, I guess. I hope you have the fulfilling life you always wanted. My lawyer said that the letter you wrote ensures you won’t get a dime from me. So take care. Signed, Your Ex-Wife, Rich As Hell & Free! P.S. I don’t know if I ever told you this, but my sister Carla was born Carl. I hope that’s not a problem!

Related Posts

Our Gender Reveal Cake Was Dropped by My Mother-in-Law—But the Joke Was on Her

My mother-in-law, Patricia, has a habit of stirring up drama during special moments—from wearing a nearly white dress to our wedding to posting our pregnancy news before…

I BOUGHT IT AS A JOKE—BUT THEN I SAW HIS FACE

I wasn’t planning on stopping by the thrift store that day. My wife had sent me out for a simple floor lamp—nothing fancy, just enough to stop…

12 Weird Diabetes Skin Problems You Need To Know

Have you ever seen changes in your skin that left you puzzled? For people living with diabetes or at risk, the skin often serves as an early…

I Paid Off My Husband’s Debt and Later Found Out He Made It All Up Just to Take My Money – He Deeply Regretted It

I was married to Mike for seven years sharing routines Sunday coffee inside jokes and a quiet trust I never thought would break When my grandmother passed…

He Flew First Class with His Mom — I Was Stuck in Coach with the Kids. I Got the Last Laugh

I’m Sophie, and last holiday, my husband Clark made a bold decision — he upgraded himself and his mom to first class. Meanwhile, I was left in…

No one recognizes this talented American actress anymore… Do you?

Foster, a captivating American actress with icy blue eyes, began her career in boarding school theater before debuting in Michael Douglas’s “Adam at 6 A.M.” “Master of…