Swimmer Lia Thomas made waves last year when she, who some say is a “he,” smashed every NCAA swimming record imaginable, stealing the Women’s National Championship from more than 1600 hard-working athletes.

After a lengthy investigation, the league has decided to revoke Thomas’ title, strip her of those records, and forward her to the Indiana State Attorney for possible fraud charges.

“There were some questionable test results,” said NCAA President Joe Barron, “results we can’t ignore. It would seem that we may have been misled.

The tests in question were part of the standard league battery for transitioning athletes. They tested everything from hormone levels and performing enhancement drug use to cognitive reasoning and found Thomas was no longer eligible for league play. or awards.

Her hormones were in line and there was no evidence of PEDs, said Barron, “but on the cognitive reasoning exam she stumbled at the question “what is a woman,” and again when asked if she considers herself woke. We can’t have that sort of uncertainty representing the league.”

You can’t, patriots. Especially with Donald Trump coming back to the White House. The country is done with wokeness and wants it over with. And we couldn’t agree more. It’s time America became America again. Whenever that was.